A few years ago, I had cardiovascular bypass surgery. I was planning to travel to the US for the wedding of my son, Ezra. Feeling occasionally short of breath, I went to my cardiologist in Israel and, after examining me, he told me that I should not travel since my risk of having a heart event was significant. And so I experienced the wedding virtually on Skype instead of being there in person.
Being in the hospital for a serious operation, I decided, at the encouragement of a friend, to recite the confessional that Jews say when the outcome of an operation is uncertain. I said to myself: maybe my mission on earth is complete and now I will bid farewell to this world and enter the next.
After the operation, my blood pressure was fluctuating greatly, and I felt a need to be with other people. I did not want to be alone. When a friend visited, I asked him to stay longer because I wanted to be close to another living being. It truly helped me overcome my anxiety during my recovery.
That need for physical closeness when confronted with mortality is evident in Bobby Deerfield, the story of a race car driver who confronts the possibility of death after witnessing a track accident in which a friend dies. That desire for human connection intensifies when Bobby himself survives a near fatal crash.
When we first meet Bobby Deerfield, we see that he is a loner. He has forsaken his brother, his parents, his entire family. He lives a life in which he is the main character and there is no supporting cast. All he wants to do is win Formula One races. That desire to win is muted once a teammate of his dies in a racing event. The thought of death then preoccupies him.
When Bobby visits an injured racecar driver in the hospital, he serendipitously meets Lillian Morelli, an idiosyncratic, impulsive woman who captures his attention. Although she has a serious, but unidentified, illness, she has left the hospital without authorization, asking him for a ride. She does not want to be confined to the hospital and yearns for freedom. Although Bobby does not initially understand the nature of her illness, he eventually discovers that her malady is life threatening and that her time is short.
The desire to be physically close to people when faced with mortality is akin to what I felt in the hospital after my surgery. This emotion resonates in the early stages of Bobby and Lillian’s relationship, when Lillian asks Bobby to be close to her. She does not mean close in an intimate way.
In truth, his relationship with the quirky Lillian changes the way he views the world. No longer is life only about him; it now considers others besides him.
The longing for human connection when faced with death moves Bobby to become more sensitive to those around him and less self-centered. After realizing that Lillian’s days are numbered, he approaches a gardener that he does not know and simply tells him that he wants to talk to him. The simple desire to be close to another human being is now very important to him.
I write this review a few days before Yom Kippur, a holy day in the Jewish calendar when we ask for forgiveness for the wrongdoings we have committed against people by always putting our own needs first. The Torah reminds man that he always has a choice about the way he lives and relates to other human beings. In Deuteronomy the Lord states: “I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. You shall choose life, so that you and your offspring will live” (30:19). The message: the confrontation with death makes us value life more. The outcome of Bobby Deerfield’s encounter with death is an epiphany that makes him appreciate life and the physical presence of others.