Herman, a student at the high school where I was the principal, was difficult to like. He viewed all school rules as unnecessary and constantly challenged my administrative decisions. He did not like the school’s dress code and he was unhappy when I required the basketball team to wear a kippah (head covering) when seated on the bench. Moreover, he arrived late to the school’s daily prayer services and exerted minimal effort in all his classes.
So it was with great surprise that I saw him many years later, wearing a kippah, fully observant, and interacting with me and others who knew him in high school with respect and sensitivity. What happened? In truth, I did not know. What I did know is that he matured in ways I could not have anticipated and the change in him was remarkable and greatly welcomed.
In Captains Courageous, Harvey Cheyne, Jr., an orphaned and extremely wealthy boy, undergoes a metamorphosis; but in his case we understand why it happened. Traveling on an ocean liner from America to England, he accidentally falls off the boat. He almost drowns but is saved by fishermen off the Great Banks of Newfoundland.
The fishing boat will be at sea for three months and cannot change course at the whim of a young boy. Harvey is not used to hard labor nor is he used to not having his way. He is angry when the captain of the boat tells him he cannot return to the port from which he departed. Moreover, the captain tells him that if he does not work like others on the boat, he will not eat.
After initially maintaining his attitude of privilege, Harvey, with the aid of the captain’s son, Dan, gradually learns to be a skillful fisherman and sailor. For the first time in his life, Harvey senses he has a true friend. Experiencing challenges together at sea, their friendship blossoms and both boys see one another as comrades for life. When Harvey finally returns to port, he is a changed person.
The main agent responsible for this change is his new-found friend Dan, who sees the potential for goodness within Harvey. With good will and patience, he watches as Harvey matures into a bright young man who is no longer concerned only with himself, but with significant others as well.
Everybody needs a friend. Rabbi Jonathan Sacks describes Moses’s need for friendship and support. Sacks observes that when Moses is feeling overwhelmed by what he has to do, God does not tell him to cheer up. Instead He tells him to do something: “Gather for Me seventy of the elders of Israel. I will take some of the spirit that is on you and put it on them; and they shall bear the burden of the people along with you so that you will not bear it all by yourself.” In essence, God is advising Moses not to go it alone. Do not be isolated. Make friends.
Sacks writes: “at the moment of Moses’ maximum emotional vulnerability, God Himself speaks to Moses as a friend. This is fundamental to Judaism as a whole. For us God is not (merely) Creator of the universe, Lord of history, Sovereign, Lawgiver and Redeemer, the God of capital-letter nouns. He is also close, tender, loving: He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds (Ps. 147:3). He is a friend and friends matter. They shape our lives.”
The Sages who authored The Ethics of the Fathers, a classic of Jewish wisdom literature, advise us to “acquire for yourself a friend.” It is not good for people to be alone. We all need companionship; we all need people who help us endure the vicissitudes of life.
Harvey Cheyne in Captains Courageous learns that through friendship his own life becomes more meaningful. Learning to think and care about others makes you a better human being.
FULL MOVIE AVAILABLE ONLINE ON YOUTUBE AND NETFLIX.